Old goodie: No To EU

This one didn’t make it into the old b2 archive of mine. It’s actually the post I’ve been most happy to write, since I don’t know how to be funny. Sometimes I’ve got a lot on my mind which I want to tell someone about, and sometimes I just can’t express myself good enough to be understood. Fuck it. Here’s one of my old goodies named “No To EU”.
It has come to my attention, and a whole lot other peoples attentions that the hottest topic this week when it comes to international politics, is the French people saying NO (or “non”, as it is spoken in French, would look better) to the new EU constitution.(The poll was: No (55%) and Yes (45%)) And by voting “non” they also protest agianst the president Jacques Chirac. But what is so great about EU? Why have so many countries in the Europe decided to join this union? I can’t explain it by talking about politics and such, and since it’s you, my fans, who’re reading this article, I’m going to explain the EU with elements you’re familiar with.

Picture this: You’re playing a MMORPG where your character is a high-level Warrior with damaging spells, expensive equipments and lots of gold. You’re just finished healing yourself in town, and then you start walking to the gate of the town when suddenly a lot of players gathers around you in a big, big circle. It is the Noob Union (NU=EU)! They’re all equipped with bad equipment, doesn’t have a high level (except a few) and they all lack 2 very important things – resources (gold) and power (damage). So there they stand, around you in a circle, grinning teeth and staring at you with a twinkle in their eyes. Suddenly one of the biggest characters (Let’s call him England) of the NU steps in the circle and says:
“Join us, or suffer the consequences!”
You stare at him, without expecting anything and say:
“No.”
You look around and see that the circle is getting smaller, tighter. Then England says:
“Why?”

Now, lets take a pause in the MMORPG-gaming and lets see what different types of MMORPG’s has to say about experience points when teaming up with other players:

World of Warcraft:Party Experience
Experience is shared with other party members. For a party member to get experience, they must be within a certain distance from a kill. It’s best to have players around the same level in a party, but players that have vastly higher or lower levels will still get some experience.Anarchy Online:Experience bonus
When in a team, the Experience (XP) gained is divided on all the team members. However, the total XP reward is higher than when a single player does the same task. I.e. killing a creature alone might give a reward of 1000 XP. Killing the same creature in a team will give each member less than 1000 XP, but the total XP for the team members would be greater than 1000.

Now lets head back to the gaming:
And now you know why. Why won’t you join the NU when they’re a lot more than you? Because you know that if you join, you’ll have to share all your resources (your gold) and when you kill a monster you won’t get all the experience points yourself. You’ll have to share the experience points and then, sooner or later, all will be as strong and resourceful as you are at the moment. And, of course you don’t want that because then there’s no point in playing when you can’t be best.
So you tell them you ain’t interested because you’re going to log off now. So you log off, mumbling a curse against the NU, and starts surfing the internet for hatesites against the NU. You find a forum and starts complaining, but nothing happens…except you feeling good about yourself. Then you go to bed to sleep.

Next day.
You’re finished from work/school or whatever, and finally you’re looking forward to kill some monsters and get some level up with your Warrior. You start the game, log on, and boom! An update message hits you right in the face. It’s a new patch which has just been released and if you want to play, you’ll have to update. So you start updating without even blinking. Ok, update is finished, lets read what the new version has to offer:MMORPG Version 1.3b
# Because of the amount of complaining from a team called “Noob Union”, we had to do this unexpected update #
Updates:
> All who is invited to join a party consisting of 25 members or more, must accept or be taxed after the new regulation.
> The new regulation:
–1.000 credit taxation
–Must pay 100 credit per unique item
–Independent players must follow the rules of the team with the highest amount of members in town(”Say…WHAT?!?” You think silently)
You connect to the server and you start where you logged off last time, in town. You look around, and there they are, everywhere, members of the Noob Union. Now, because of the new update you’ll have to follow the rules of the NU. So even though you won’t join the the NU, you still have to follow its rules. That completely ruins the game!

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is my point of view when it comes to EU. Norway, which isn’t and won’t be a member of the EU, still have to follow their rules and regulations. It’s they who decides how much fish we are to export to other countries and it is they who decides what driving-rules is supposed to reign in the entire Europe (Norway included). I hate the EU.
Good work on the election French people!
Have another fantastic day!