I Want Vin Diesel in Every Movie I See

Yesterday Haltemien dragged me to see the world premiere of Fast & Furious. I’ll spoil the movie right now by saying there’s cars, a race and a girl involved in the plot. But what I really noticed was this:

Vin Diesel is an emotionally deep actor

He’s just sooo deep. If the ocean’s bottom is at 4000 km below the sea line, then Vin Diesel’s depth is at least ten times that number. This leads me to my first point in this digression:

Vin Diesel shouldn’t act in action movies anymore

He’s already become somewhat of a typecast. He’s always this strong, emotional fellow who believes in doing the right thing. If the right thing is defined as killing the mob bosses with a wrench, then so be it.

This has to stop! It’s time we all saw Vin Diesel’s true acting performance. That brings me to my next point:

Remake movies, add Vin Diesel

Hollywood’ve done so many poor remakes over the last decade. Why not do something great about that? For instance, add some Vin Diesel in the mix and it’ll sell for billions of dollars. Like these:

Donnie Darko

Who cares about that gay Jake who played in that cowboy movie, anyways?

Shawshank Redemption

Prison just got more entertaining!

Star Wars VI: Return of the Jedi

This jedi is strong with the force. Brute force.

Dear Hollywood…

…I really hope you all read this post, in which I know you agree with me. Maybe I should start a petition to get Vin Diesel into more serious roles. Or maybe not, since I’m severely lazy. Vin Diesel will always be my favourite serious actor who got real depth.

Johnny Depp can kiss my ass. I’m all for Vin Diesel.